Douglas Adams once famously said (or maybe it wasn't Adams at all) that the reason Australia doesn't have more of the world's poisonous snakes is because our poisonous spiders have eaten them.

He could be right.

Also did you know that:

When biting an insect the spider first injects venom and then vomits stomach juices over the wound. both these chemicals attack the insect's internal tissue and breaks it down into a kind of liquid soup. Then the spider pumps the liquid through her small mouth opening.

As someone who, in true North Queensland style, has an abiding horror of snakes, this is largely good news. Even if it means I have to barrack for spiders.

The enemies of my enemy, & all that.


The second confusing thing about Australia are the animals. They can be divided into three categories: Poisonous, Odd, and Sheep.
It is true that of the 10 most poisonous arachnids on the planet, Australia has 9 of them. Actually, it would be more accurate to say that of the 9 most poisonous arachnids, Australia has all of them. However, there are curiously few snakes, possibly because the spiders have killed them all. But even the spiders won't go near the sea.

Today I discovered I haven't had health insurance for 2 years.

I'm not even sure how that happened. Something to do with choosing the very cheapest health insurer I could find. Naturally enough this insurer lacked the business acumen or customer service or plain old common sense to contact me once my bank account details changed & they couldn't withdraw payment anymore. Two years ago. No bills, no payments, no health insurance.

In actual fact, I did discover the discrepancy when I was faced with a hospital visit some months back, but I had other things on my mind. And then my insurer actually sent me an ad -- to my home address, the one they kept not sending bills to -- asking me to 'come back'. So I ticked the box, 'yes, I'd like to come back' & waited. Nothing happened. (Again, cheap insurer, not very proactive about the money thing.) So I emailed. Nothing happened. And I emailed again and TODAY they rang & said 'we left you several messages' (I'm not sure where, probably on the wall outside their building) & how would you like to pay today.

Well, for a start, I'm not in the mood to pay today and & I'm not sure you guys are really my best bet. AND you're not the best bargain insurer anymore either, so.... stick it, really.

Sooo, I am now looking for Australia's cheapest health insurance (bare minimum hospital cover to keep my taxes down). Anyone got a lead?

The good news is that Concord Hospital took exceptional care of me while I was there some months back, giving me a bed, several meals, on-call nursing staff all night (who kept taking my damn blood pressure), strong painkillers, and -- from what I can tell -- a very good, intelligent, pro-active surgical team. All for free. Because I had no health insurance. What does that tell you, eh?

'Course, I'm paying for it now...

The learned Mr Payne has snapped me here, part of the 2007 Snapshot of Australian Speculative Fiction:

We'll be blogging interviews from Monday 13 August to Sunday 19 August and archiving them at ASif!: Australian SpecFic in Focus. You can read interviews at:

http://random-alex.livejournal.com/
http://girliejones.livejournal.com/
http://benpayne.livejournal.com/
http://kaaronwarren.livejournal.com/
http://cassiphone.livejournal.com/
http://kathrynlinge.livejournal.com/
http://rosies-travels.blogspot.com/

Yet they feel as if they're hurling themselves at same walls as any new writer here. The perception, for example, that only Big Name Authors get published. That you have to know people to get published. That perhaps being Australian is a strike against them.

jaylake takes up the call.

Everyone who thinks being an Oz writer is a count against you when subbing to o's markets, raise your hands.

Now put your hands down & type a thoughtful response to Jay's post, you freaks.